Don’t syphon your hyphens

coin-op showers
Q.
What’s the proper use of hyphens?

A. Hyphens diminish the space between words. They bring words closer rather than separating them. Here is a guide to the most common uses of hyphens.

Whether you are a native speaker of English or a speaker of English as a second language (ESL), these tips can be helpful.

compound words  Use hyphens to separate parts of compound words. Use the dictionary to learn whether to use one word, two words or one hyphenated word. Water-repellent, but waterproof; cross-examine, but notebook.

multiple-word adjectives  Use hyphens to connect two or more words functioning together as an adjective before a noun.

  • Buy some paper-wrapped fish at the market.
  • We charge for in-house consulting and for EPA-mandated documents.
  • Sears’ 120-piece tool-set.
  • Profit-sharing plans (profit modifies sharing, not plans).
  • Levi’s red-tab jeans, on sale for $90.00.

avoiding ambiguity  Use hyphens when uncertainty would arise without them.

  • She will speak to small-business men (not short males).
  • Forty-odd employees would be silly without the hyphen.
  • The agency provides domestic-violence training (training in domestic violence, not an at-home training session on violence).
  • A genuine-leather catcher’s mitt (a mitt made of genuine leather, not a mitt for a leather-catcher).
  • Hyphenate to distinguish re-creation from recreation.
  • Hyphenate to differentiate under-served from undeserved.
  • Hyphenate to separate awkward double or triple letters, such as anti-intellectual and cross-stitch.

multiple words as one   Use hyphens with words that you want to glue together into a single unit. The hyphen brings single words together so they work as a team.

  • Slab-on-grade.
  • A less-is-more philosophy.
  • The Eagles-Redskins game.
  • The Willard-Laney-Johnson-Elliott family reunion.
  • The Atlanta-Philadelphia flight.
  • When my son sat on my lap during his first Phillies game, it was a take-me-out-to-the-ballgame feeling.

suspended hyphens  In a series of similar entries, when each entry requires a hyphen, write the hyphens and skip (or suspend) the common word.

  • You may buy first-, second- or third-class tickets.
  • The agency provides before- and after-school care.
  • We offer both short- and long-term leases.

fractions  Use hyphens for fractions. One-fourth of my income goes to pay off the national debt (the hyphen brings words closer).

incorrect hyphens   Do not use hyphens when the same words follow the noun.

  • We do in-house consulting.
  • We do the consulting in house.
  • We did a last-minute edit of the nonfiction manuscript.
  • We edited the nonfiction manuscript at the last minute.

more incorrect hyphens  Do not use hyphens to connect -ly adverbs to the words they modify.

  • A slowly (no hyphen) moving truck.
  • A partially (no hyphen) edited manuscript.
  • An especially sympathetic writing coach.

Quiz: How many hyphens would you insert in this paragraph?

The 12 story, glass and limestone tower improves the look of the entire neighborhood. The new condominium development on Bank Street features homes with state of the art appliances and the latest in furnishings. Buyers looking for beautifully appointed two and three bedroom contemporary homes with open floor plans should visit this high-end development. First-quarter sales have been brisk, attesting to the property’s solid investment potential. Buyers and their agents should stop by the sales office on Bank Street or request a copy of the four color brochure.

Answer: My version adds 11 hyphens.

The 12-story, glass-and-limestone tower improves the look of the entire neighborhood. The new condominium development on Bank Street features homes with state-of-the-art appliances and the latest in furnishings. Buyers looking for beautifully appointed two- and three-bedroom contemporary homes with open floor plans should visit this high-end development. First-quarter sales have been brisk, attesting to the property’s solid investment potential. Buyers and their agents should stop by the sales office on Bank Street or request a copy of the four-color brochure.

Writing coaching for companies and people

Son pitching first ball for Padres

My son pitches first ball for Padres.

Here’s a sports metaphor:

Sports teams work at trying to win by creating a playbook and scheduling practice sessions. They invest time and money in developing game-time skills. They coach their players.
How can you apply those strategies to your corporate (or nonprofit) writing team?

When companies want to improve their market performance, they hire coaches to make a positive impact on leadership development, grooming successors. Human resources professionals say that coaching helps most when it

  • Improves individual performance and productivity.
  • Develops executive leadership.
  • Improves managerial performance.

How can writing coaching help your company? Coaching can help individuals improve the speed and efficiency of their writing. I have handled many scenarios like these:

  • Problem: Your new hire sends emails to clients with embarrassing informality and many errors.
  • Solution: You hire a writing consultant to train on professional email standards.
  • Problem: The director of a regional nonprofit wants to improve communication and create new stakeholders.
  • Solution: S/he hires writing coach to train on transforming technical data, write readable documents and aim for ordinary people, not PhDs and passionate fans.
  • Problem: One medical center’s physicians devote weeks to writing research reports for publication.
  • Solution: The research director hires a writing coach to train physicians in the best practices of journal writing. The medical center’s publications increase four-fold in one year.

Can you improve your work with one-on-one writing coaching? Yes.

  • Do you have an imminent deadline and need some help picking up your writing speed?
  • Are your writing goals super-ambitious? Do you want to find a way to actually achieve them?
  • Do you have a challenging boss or client? Do you require some tips on handling Mr. or Ms. Difficult?
  • Do you procrastinate about writing until the stress boils over?
  • Are you stalled in a particular writing project?

While your scenario may differ, these examples show how you can use nonfiction-writing training to handle your writing needs. If you tell me about your writing goals and challenges, I will give you tailored, personalized writing coaching.

Phone, e-mail or knock on my door.

 

Use strong verbs. Avoid weak verbs.

Dewey defeats Truman
Use active verbs to tell almost every nonfiction story.

Past tense
Present tense
Future tense
Active 
We completed the project.
We did complete it.
We did complete the project.
We complete the project.
Are we completing it?
We will complete the project.
Will we complete it?
Passive
The project was completed.
Was the project completed?
The project is completed.
Is the project completed?
Will the project be completed?
The project will be completed.
Active
He designed the shoes.
He did design the shoes.
He designs the shoes.
Should he design the shoes?
He will design the shoes.
Will he design the shoes?
Passive
The shoes were designed.
The shoes were designed by him.
The shoes are designed.
The shoes are designed by him.
The shoes will be designed.
Will the shoes be designed?
Active
You kissed the bride.
Did you kiss the bride?
You kiss the bride.
You do kiss the bride.
Everyone kisses the bride.
You will kiss the bride.
Will you kiss the bride?
Passive 
The bride was kissed.
By whom was the bride kissed?
The bride is kissed.
Is the bride being kissed?
By whom is the bride being kissed?
The bride will be kissed.
The bride will be kissed
by her lecherous uncle.

 

Wield active verbs

A verb expresses an action, a condition or a state of being. A verb acts, does something or exists. I call the person who commits the verb the perpetrator and the person or thing that receives the action the victim. Whether you are writing for print or electronic media, for resumes or websites, use the active voice as often as possible.
 

Active verbs
Passive verbs
The subject performs the action.
The subject is acted upon by someone.
Require fewer words.
Require more words.
Are more personal.
Are less personal.
Are more direct.
Are more indirect.
Convey conviction and responsibility.
Mute the activity; lack authority; suggest doubt.
Identify and emphasize the perpetrator.
Make the subject the perpetrator of the verb.
Excel for writing news and information.
Excel for communicating bad news.
Focus on the perpetrator of the verb.
Hide/protect/minimize the perpetrator of the verb.
Identify the perpetrator of the verb.
Emphasize the victim of the action/verb.
Tell the truth, the whole truth.
Smooth political situations and ruffled feathers.

    “When men read rape-and-battery stories written in the passive voice, they attribute less blame to the perpetrator – and less harm to the victim – than when reading the active-voice versions. The reason? Probably, says Nancy Henley, PhD, because passive-voice sentences don’t mention the attacker. As a result, male readers ignore the perpetrator and blame the victim.” According to Psychology Today, Spring 1995, based on research at UCLA.

Can non-native English speakers write nonfiction?

all rules apply

Q. English is not my first language, but I have to write business reports for work. Help!

A. Help is on the way.

I understand that your goal is to be able to write better, more precise e-mails and reports – and to produce them more quickly. Even though English is not your first language – even though you write English as a Second Language (ESL) – you can do this.

If we were meeting in person, we would spend two hours together each week, devoting one and a half hours to writing and a half hour to vocabulary. Whether you are writing to colleagues, co-workers or clients in Camden or Cairo, you will be better prepared to write what you need to write.

As an educated person with an excellent command of English, you know grammar far better than most native speakers. For the writing segment we would begin with the basics:
• A quick review of grammar, including parts of speech, pronouns and prepositions.
• A special focus on active verbs and how they improve all writing.
• A review of punctuation, sentence structure and paragraphs.
• Ways to edit and proofread your early drafts.

Then we would kick it up a notch and discuss:
• Clarifying your thoughts before you write.
• Organizing your document.
• Knowing your audience.
Writing in parallel construction.
Avoiding common mistakes.
• Tightening your copy.
• Formatting (if appropriate).
• Spelling and grammar tools in Microsoft Word.

Along the way, if you get stuck in the middle of a document, you can call or e-mail me. If I’m at my desk, I can often answer immediately.

For the vocabulary lessons, we will talk during each session about a business-related topic, such as human resources, domestic business and international business, the areas in which you specialize. I will create short lists of words that you can master in a week.

P.S. Until we begin….

Buy an inexpensive crossword book, at a dollar store or a chain pharmacy. Start doing the puzzles, looking up answers whenever you want. Keep lists of the words you need to master.

8 things to write in your memoir

Little Me

Little Me

Everyone wants to write a memoir. But nobody knows where to start.

Here’s a writing tip: Start with the easy, nonfictional facts of growing up.

1. Write about the street where you lived. Draw the floor plan of the house you grew up in – or the house you remember best, or the one where you lived at age 9.
2. Describe rooms, closets, porches, pianos, the kitchen table. Mention the art or cracks that decorated the walls. Draw the paths to the front and back doors. Draw the sidewalk where you jumped rope.
3. As you write, consider the sounds, smells, tastes and feelings the house evokes. Write about the smell of sauerkraut or your father’s pipe tobacco. Write the sounds of a squeaky floorboard, the screen door slamming, your sister stomping her snow off her boots on the landing, the parakeet calling.
4. Write about the smooth velvet of the wing chair. The swish of beaded curtains. The steam rising from a pot of soup. The cold kitchen when no one prepared dinner. The lightning outside your bedroom window.
5. Write about the people and their activities. Show your mom leaning over the tub, giving the twins a bath. Show grandmom letting you taste the peaches as she makes preserves. Explain your disgust when Uncle Charlie demands a kiss in exchange for one measly tootsie roll. Depict Dad hammering as he builds a set of shelves for your room.
6. Write what happens in each space. Describe lying on your sister’s bed on Saturday morning, listening to the radio and playing with the parakeet. Write that you are kneeling on a stool, helping Mom make kreplach or gnocchi or kielbasa. Create a picture of yourself leaning on the bathroom door, whining for your brother to hurry up.
7. Tell how you feel in each space. Explain where you go when you feel sad. Mad. Scared. Write the details of the space where you dance and do homework.
8. Once you write these factual details, force yourself to dig deeper than the surface recollections. Now you can write what you were really feeling at the time.

And here’s an idea: Be a bag lady. Save every idea that comes to you: in a bag, a box, a diary or a Word document. Save them now. Write them later.